100 Things AnE Characters Are Not Allowed To Do
by wildkurofang
Summary: In which God has a wicked sense of humor and the Vatican is not amused. List with snippets attached. Everything goes. Including the cast of Ao no Exorcist's sanity. Rated T because Satan is a very bad parent.
1. 1-5 We Are All Gonna Die

**100 Things AnE Characters Are Not Allowed To Do**

**In other words a list. What? List? I didn't say list! It's not a list if you add scenes...right?**

**Rated T because Satan rolls like that. Sorry, if you can't stomach his language. Um, all humor accepted. No Demons were hurt in the making of this list. Anything and everything is game. Even cheap shots at the author. Katou and me. Spoilers for latest manga chapters!  
**

**Credit goes to the first list maker ever in Fanfiction. And no, I don't know who that is. But~ These ideas are all mine!  
**

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Ao no Exorcist characters are not allowed to:

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**1. Use Rin as a Human Sacrifice.**

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Lucifer barged into the dimly lit room and sneered imperially at the crowd gathered there, "What exactly do you think you are all doing?"

The brown-hooded figures surrounding a stone alter amongst candles and incense burners paused their ominous Latin chanting and looked at each other in confusion.

One of the braver souls spoke up with an uncertain tone, "Um, well we were trying to create the Anti-Christ…"

A tick mark sprouted on the masked forehead of the Demon King of Light. "And who gave you permission to attempt such a ritual? I mean," The white-haired Demon gestured to their surroundings and then snubbed them all by raising his nose into the air, "Just look at this place!" The haughty attitude was somewhat marred by the sudden hacking up of blood he engaged in but he was on a roll and no one dared interrupt. "It's filthy! I won't stand for this- This disgrace! This degradation of such an important event! Give me back my sacrifice! I'll show you how to properly sacrifice someone's soul in order to take their bod-I mean bring ruin upon the world by summoning Father."

Chilling on his back, chained to the alter, one Okumura Rin interrupted, "Hey, I do get a say in this right? I mean, no one said anything about human sacrifice—not that I am even remotely human, son of Satan hello?—I don't think it's in my contract with Kazue Katou either…"

The eldest son of Satan looked skeptical putting his hands on his hips. "Then what are you doing right now?"

The navy-haired teen blinked and then gestured to himself with the clink of chains following the action while he replied quizzically, "What? This? This isn't human sacrifice. Mephisto or Angel are going to bust in any moment now and save me. These idiots," Here he jerked his chin to the robed figures milling about. "Won't even get close to the whole Satan-possessing-world-ending-apocalypses-creating sacrifice they were aiming for."

At this the hooded figures exclaimed, "What!"

"That's not fair!"

"Yeah, we kidnapped you fair and square!"

Rin actually took the time to roll his eyes and look annoyed. "Well, life's not fair! If it bothers you all that much take it up with my lawyer!"

Grumbling, the crowd of Satanic worshipers dispersed leaving the two Demons alone in the dank room.

"Hmm, that went quicker than expected." Lucifer grinned past his mask and walked toward the still chained teen. "Here I thought I was going to have to bring up in court the illegality of this whole operation and the fact that they didn't have a human sacrifice permit."

Having no one else to talk to the blue-eyed male blinked and queried, "You can get a permit for that?"

Looking surprised, the older Demon nodded and explained, "Hai, but only in certain parts of Europe…and in Central America. The Aztec's are willing to pay exorbitant amounts of money for them."

"Hn, you learn something new every day…"

Nodding sagely, the taller Demon asked, "That as it may be…you look a little uncomfortable."

Rolling his eyes a second time, he rattled the chains pinning his arms to the stone and quipped, "Well, what do you expect? This entire plot reeked of B-list movie wannabes. I swear several of them were just muttering gibberish where they had forgotten the Latin chant!"

Shaking his head in disdain the Light King snorted. "In my day that sort of thing got your throat slit. Jeeze, standards these days, they've just gone to hell."

The young exorcist-in-training nodded in agreement and spoke sympathetically, "True dat. Now…you mind getting me down from here?" He jerked the chains for emphasis and rustled the white ceremonial smock with floppy sleeves they had forced him to wear that only came to his thighs. "It's a bit chilly in here."

Rubbing his chin thoughtfully he asked, "Will you let me sacrifice you?"

Rin took a few seconds to think about that, weighing the pros and cons. "I'll talk to my lawyer. But I can't guarantee anything."

The Nazi-imitating Demon smiled, shark-teeth showing and lilted, "That's better than nothing! ~" And then his grin stretched until it nearly split his face menacingly. "Now hold still. Or you might lose a limb."

Rin squeaked.

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**2. Dress Yukio to look like his deceased **_**Mother.**_

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"Da fuck? She's too tall."

Yukio grit his teeth and resisted the urge to pull the itchy wig on top of his head off. The whole thing was ridiculous!

"It's been fifteen years. Of course, she is taller. She's not an immortal Demon you know."

The white wolf that sat ablaze on his haunches in the middle of the courtroom rose one of his nonexistent eyebrows. "Why the hell is she wearing fucking glasses?"

Lewin Light aka Lightning, Arc Knight extraordinaire tried not to snicker at the baleful glare of his fellow Exorcist. "Well, not everyone can have perfect vision you know? I have reading glasses at home actually."

Satan just deadpanned, "Yuri has more moles then this bitch does."

Needless to say, the Vatican didn't have to dispose of a dead canine corpse because after it was riddled with enough bullet holes to imitate Swiss cheese it combusted into ashes and disappeared. They only had to sweep up the spent bullet casings.

Yukio disposed of his wig in a similar manner growling that the whole thing was a waste of his time and that it had been a stupid plan to begin with. If the Vatican really wanted to make a peace treaty with Gehenna, they should have never tried to kill his Kaa-san in the first place.

Mephisto sulked in the corner. "I thought it was a good plan…"

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**3. Let Mephisto talk for more than fifteen minutes per meeting.**

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"-And this is why the Chinese have no originality! I mean, Shinatty-chan?! What kind of name is that! At the very least, they could have come up with a better plagiarized marketing name then Shinatty-chan! While I admire the play on words and understand that they are still quite mad about the Rape of Nanking that is no excuse to use linguistic rape on the hard-earned fruits of Japanese ingenuity!"

Lightning raised his hand hesitantly, that laid-back smile on his face actually looking strained.

The Grigori were quick—like a panther breaking the neck of its prey—to call on him. "Yes, Lightning?!"

"I move to break for lunch." Seeing the irate look on the Japanese Head Branch's face he added, "Please?"

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**4. Hint at the fact that Once Upon A Time in Talmudic lore Mephisto might have been the Angel of Death.**

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"When in Rome."

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**5. Ask Rin if he is the Anti-Christ and then try to get him to autograph their Bible.**

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"Hey, your name is Okumura Rin right?" Lightning was intrigued and he circled the unsuspecting teen with a critical look in his eyes.

Not realizing the danger of speaking to a man that could run circles around everyone he met, Rin nodded his head and looked for Shura's face among the many Exorcist seated at the long table in front of him. She was too busy glaring daggers at Angel to notice his predicament. He wasn't shy but… This guy looked kinda creepy.

"Really?" His eyebrows rose—not that you could tell thanks to the Safari hat on his head—and he smiled. "You're just a little kid."

Face flushing at the others comment he snarled, "Not a kid!" His tail lashed the air and he stopped himself before he could flare up. That wouldn't have been such a grand idea when surrounded by people even Shura was wary of. Alternatively, ones that had threaten to execute him once upon a time. "I'm fifteen!"

Chuckling at the strange yet almost innocent reaction from the Demon he had heard to be a bloodthirsty monster—via Angel's ranting of course—he smiled thankful he had chosen to see with his own eyes what type of person the boy was. And it certainly wasn't whom he had thought.

Grumbling about not being a kid the navy-haired male looked straight at the stranger that had waltz up to him while everyone else was busy fighting about how to properly deal with a gigantic Gehenna gate that was ripping the very fabric of realty apart in Germany.

Rubbing his chin in analyses, the dark-haired man surveyed the child before him. "Hmm, but you are the son of Satan are you not?"

Rin glared at the man and huffed, "Yeah. You got a problem with that?" He already been asked that multiple times by now and was quite casual about throwing it out.

Of course, casual for the man questioning him meant uncomfortable for everyone else around him. And it just so happened that the Grigori turned to him in that moment to ask his opinion on something and all everyone heard was, "So does that make you the Anti-Christ?"

A silence descended on the room and even Mephisto didn't say a word.

"…" They could have heard a Maken drop.

"I'm Catholic dammit!" Rin broke it and then bagged it before throwing it off a bridge onto oncoming traffic.

"So?" He pulled out a leather-bound book and held it up to the kid's face. "But just in case, can I have your autograph?"

"What?"

"Autograph. Can you sign my Bible?"

"What?"

* * *

1. Because we all know that that is the only way Satan is going to be able to stay in Assiah long enough to take over the world. And Lucifer wants his body because he is sick as a dog and really who actually wants Satan to take over Assiah? (Yuri's opinion is not valid.)

2. He looks like a male version. Simple as that.

3. I wanted a rant on Shinatty-chan. Mephisto was the only one who qualified.

4. Hebrew lore. Wouldn't that be a horrifying thought? Grim Reaper Samael extraordinaire?

5. Come on, don't tell me you weren't thinking that?

Any suggestions? I won't drown myself in coffee if you don't review though.

Tarry a while. Thou art so fair. ~ Wild-Tama

**Update my other stories? What? What stories? There is nothing to see here... Whistles guiltily... **


	2. 6-10 Here We Go Again

**So I would like to thank everyone for their support! To all you who fav'ed, followed, and reviewed! Thanks!**

**Anyway, these don't feel as funny...but the next ones are I do believe. And I'm glad I was able to get Lightning's personality! Here is some more for ya, ProbableImpossibilities! And number four was kinda an in-joke, fufufu~ Glad ya got it! Samael was said to be the patron of Rome...  
**

**Sarcastic and Clumsy Girl wanted some Amaimon...and I delivered. Ask and you shall receive~**

**Also thanks to Starbringer101 and ProbableImpossibilities for the suggestions! A DemonKing! family Reunion must now be written and I think I have something in mind for Shima's hair color... **

**Anyway here ya go! 6-10!  
**

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_Ao no Exorcist Characters are not allowed to:_

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**6. Say that there is a Bring-a-Demon King-to-Work Day.**

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"Aniue…" The green haired Demon surveyed the duel gold, crimson-haired and scantily-clad lady in front of him and decided that she was by far the strangest thing he had ever seen.

"Is she a human-sized mochi?"

"Why, you little-"

"No, she is an Exorcist. Who I will not stop from castrating you if you don't stop staring at her."

"…Hai."

He kept staring.

A tick mark appeared on her forehead and she ground out, "What is this? Some kind of sick joke? I don't remember the Vatican ever approving of having this guy around."

Mephisto seemed almost annoyed as her, which was a first in her book. "Tou-san said it was Bring-a-Demon King-to-Work Day."

She blinked and then stared.

He elaborated, "Which means in a language you can understand: Get-Amaimon-out-of-my-hair-before-I-rip-him-into-b ite-sized-pieces."

Her mouth made an, "O," and much sympathy was shed.

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**7. Then bring Amaimon to a Head Branch Meeting.**

* * *

Because him and Lightning having a staring competition was by far the scariest thing anyone had ever seen.

"Aniue?"

"…Hai?" Mephisto looked exasperated.

"He's fun."

And he went back to staring despite the tense atmosphere of an Arc Knight and a Demon King clashing in epic combat.

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**8. Convince Amaimon it is Okay to use his Hamster-form to sneak food out of the Okumura Twins' fridge.**

* * *

Because really, Rin didn't want to open the door of the freezer and have a brick-sized hamster fall onto him before it transformed into a frostbitten Demon King. And then have to drag him into the bathroom to de-frost him with a hot bath.

Telling Mephisto why the Earth King was sleeping in his bed with Rin's clothes on him and not his own attire on was not an easy task either.

The things Rin did for family.

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**9. Tell Angel White Day in Japan is in honor of him and his amazing prowess as the Paladin.**

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"Of course they would! After all, I am the best Paladin the Vatican has ever had! Seeing me is a gift unto itself! Unlike that sorry excuse called Fujimoto-"

Shura had to slap a hand over his mouth and drag him away while Yukio and the rest of the ExWire's held Rin down before the "best Paladin the Vatican [had] ever had," was reduced to an extra crispy chicken.

He was only mollified when Shiemi later accepted his _Honmei-choco _that day.

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**10. Let Lightning hack the Vatican Database and change Arthur Auguste Angel's name to Sir Baldy-Lot per request as an April Fool's joke.**

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"_Agent Storm, I repeat, come in Agent Storm. Over."_

Lightning sighed and pressed the button on his military-grade walk-a-talkie. _"Yes Shura?"_

Static hissed before she groused over the line, _"Yer suppose' ta say Over! And use my codename! Over."_

Shoulders slumping Lightning rubbed the bridge of his nose. At any other time, he would have been all over this plan with a jolly attitude to match but… _"I read you Agent Lingerie, I repeat, I read you Agent Lingerie… Over."_ He was a little busy identifying the network code he had swiped thanks to his backdoor protocol hidden in the Vatican's mainframe.

_I can get in _soooo _much trouble for this…_ But he owed Shura a favor and Hell hath no fury like a women scorned.

"_Good boy. Now have you done it yet? Over."_

Snickering almost at the novelty of the idea he sighed into the walkie-talkie almost wistfully, _"Almost there Agent Lingerie. I repeat almost there Agent Lingerie. I just have to break the password codex and then-"_ Smirking, he tapped a few keys on his laptop while tacking a swig of orange juice from a can and eyes drooping he covered his tracks. _"It's done. Over."_

"_Great! See ya tomorrow at that world conference!"_

The line went to static but Lightning couldn't help but chuckle to himself in his living room when she added, _"Over and out."_

That woman was going to be the death of him.

* * *

6. I was just playing around when I thought: Why is Amaimon in Assiah for so long?

7. Then I was like: Surely the Vatican is not that blind...right?

8. And that lead to: He has got to still be messin' with Rin on his off-days.

9. This was originally 6. But I moved the Amaimon one's to the front for **Sarcastic and Clumsy Girl**. They were originally 21./22./23. Respectively. And Angel is an arrogant man and _Honmei-choco_ is homemade chocolate to give to the girl that gave you chocolate on Valentine's Day. It shows that you made extra effort to get the gift for her instead of _Giri-choco_ which is obligation chocolate. Not as nice or fancy a gift, got it?

10. Ah, one thing lead to another and I imaged that Lightning could hack a database if he so chose. This is what happened after the thought.

So~ When I submitted this to the Doc Manger is was 666 words exact before I put in the A/N. The face I made was like...\\^\\

So thanks for reading and I'll see ya in a day or two!

Tarry a while. Thou art so fair. ~ Wild-Tama


	3. 11-15 Nothing Can Be Unseen

**And I'm back?~ Really? So soon? And? What's this?! So many reviews! I love you guys!**

**Ok, enough question marks and exclamation points. I liked everything you guys suggested so far and am working on those numbers right now but for the time being~ You guys can have these little digits to salivate over!**

**Really, thanks for the encouragement and Bring-your-Demon King-to-Work Day is, of course, on October 31. Duh~ Just kiddin'. **

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Ao no Exorcist characters are not allowed to:

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**11. Mention Mephisto's fetish for all things Japanese during Head Branch Meetings.**

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"Yes, Lightning?!"

"Can we break for dinner?"

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**12. Let Shirou have more than one Cameo per every ten manga chapters.**

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"**Dad…what…should I do from now on…tell me…"**

"**Idiot. That's something…you should decide for yourself…"**

_Why was I…?_

The manga-ka director was waiting for the end of the line so she could pull an atypical whiteout leaving a poignant if a bit hopeful ending to the angst-ridden chapter.

Too bad it never came.

"Ack! Rin?!"

Tears were running down the boy's handsome face, twisting it into a snotty mess and he flung down the script crying, "I can't… It-it's too saddddddddddd!" And then he slid to the ground, breaking out into full-fledged tears and Shirou had to comfort his bawling son.

"Cut! Hurry! Get the make-up artist over here! We need to shoot this shot today! Or else it will be my head!"

"Fuck the shot! My son's having a breakdown!"

"So. Much. Annnnnnnnnngst! I wanna die!"

* * *

**13. Tell Shima it's Okay to hit on anything in a Skirt.**

* * *

Rin was severely wondering if he punched Shima in the face would he die?

"Aww, come on Okumura-kun just one picture! ~ You look so cute! ~" The pinkette was doing his happy wiggle dance and was holding up his phone as he backed Rin into a corner. "Please? It's not like I'm asking for a panty shot." And then his amber eyes glinted ominously. "But I would be happy if you did…kukuku~" The pink wig on his head added to the creep factor.

In the end, punching Shima's lights out did not kill him. But it did put him out of action for most of the day. He still got to tackle the giant Mephisto Pheles statue rampaging in the amusement park later that night with his groin injury though.

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**14. Let Mephisto break the Fourth-wall.**

* * *

"I wonder…"

Lightning raised his hand and asked without being called on, "Who are you talking to?"

Mephisto just snickered. "I wonder…"

Shura sighed and flapped her hand at the Demon in white. "He's breaking the fourth wall again with a soliloquy that none of us can hear aimed at an audience that no one can see in a different universe because he paused Time to do so and is making fun of us foolish mortals and the sin in our hearts while laughing his ass off at our hypocrisy and then musing about what it says about him since he likes humans so much."

Everyone stared.

"That…was really deep."

She smiled at Lightning, an impish glint in her eyes. "I try."

"I wonder…"

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**15. Give Satan a cellphone with unlimited Long-distance minutes.**

* * *

_{"Hello?"}_

_{"…"}_

_{"…Hello?"}_

_{"…"}_

_{"…"click"…"}_

Rin put his cellphone down and decided to never answer a call from the extension line, 666-666 again. No one ever answered him back and that was the forty-second time it had called him!

A dark-haired male who looked as if he was in his mid-thirties sat in a corner of his bedroom and looked gloomily down at the back-lit screen of the cellphone his second eldest son have given him. "Yuri…"

Several blue will-o'-the-wisps bobbed by his head in a comforting manner.

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11. I feel as if this can become a running gag.

12. If they were just actors _this_ is how everyone would act if given such an angst-filled script. I mean, every _single_ **time** Shirou shows up its like he brings with him Emo-Feelings of Doom. Poor Okumura Twins.

13. You know that was copious, unadulterated fanservice of the best kind.

14. And Mephisto likes to break the fourth-wall too much. Maybe that's why the Gehenna Gate was expanding? The universe is on it's way to imploding most definitely.

15. ...Ehehe? I felt like teasing the poor Demon.

And anymore suggestions? Everything is game and I take character requests as well. I thank you for reading.

Tarry a while. Thou art so fair. ~ Wild-Tama


	4. Everything Ain't So Sunny

**So, I'm back~ And with that life advice number that starbringer101 wanted to see. Hope these are funny enough for you people!**

**Ao no Exorcist Characters are not allowed to:**

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**16. Hand Mephisto a pen during a meeting and ask him to draw up Battle Plans.**

* * *

"If we storm the Illuminati headquarters here and here," He paused and swiped the electronic tablet pen across the digital board laying down pixilated ink swiftly annotating the entrances into his older brother's hideout. "Then the main force can break in here." He added another drawing and a few more squiggles to the map he was drawing and smirked, "If everything goes according to plan both Kamiki Izumo and Okumura Rin can be retrieved without major injury or loss of life."

The Demon in white turned to his colleagues and was rewarded with the awe-like adoration of their gazes. Man, he was good.

Further down the table Lightning allowed his head to fall forward onto the table and Shura was stifling the urge to laugh hysterically by stuffing her fist into her mouth. Angel just looked confused, his head tilted to the side like an adorable puppy who didn't quite understand what was going on and the Grigori really had no comment.

The only one brave enough to speak up was Yukio and even then, he was quite distressed. "Um…Sir Pheles?"

Eyes and smile wide, the Demonic Head Master turned to the brother of_ his_ youngest brother and replied, "Hai, Okumura-sensei?"

"Why did you draw a cake?"

He blinked and everyone present was given a glance at a for-once clueless Mephisto. He furrowed his eyes and looked back at the board. And then back at Yukio. And then back at the board.

"Are you feeding yourself correctly Okumura-sensei? You really shouldn't work so hard you can't even tell the deference between a blueprint of a fortress and a layered cake."

Shura's head followed Lightning's example with a fist pounding the table to boot and everyone could hear her high-pitched, "Nyahahaha'ing!" in the acoustically-built chamber.

Yukio sunk down in his chair with his head in his hands mumbling, "I'm so sorry Nii-san…"

* * *

**17. Persuade Rin that cooking with his flames is a Good Idea.**

* * *

"Shura told me to try it!"

Ukobach screeched a few choice words and then fell to his knees face in his hands.

Rin, not knowing how to comfort a Demon-cook, just sunk further into the wall wishing he had better control over his flames. He didn't even want to look over at the melted slag pile that used to be the stove.

Telling Mephisto was out of the question.

The expense bill would leave him in debt for years to come.

And Yukio…

"Please don't tell Yukio!"

Ukobach looked up from his oven mitts and glared at his cooking partner.

And then the door to the front of the dorm swung open and Yukio called out, "Tadaima Nii-san!"

Rin proceeded to cry in the corner mourning the loss of manga-reading privileges for years to come.

* * *

**18. Tell Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji that Rin scored higher than he did on the Exorcism Licensing test. **

* * *

He was happy.

He was happy.

He. Was. Happy.

Hap-py.

Say it with him, Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji was happy that his friend Okumura would not be executed.

That didn't stop him from feeling like a horrible person.

Because really, his friend would live to see another day.

That was if Suguro didn't kill the monkey himself first. The Exorcism Licensing Test results that were bolded a beautiful 94 percent were shredded in his hands and he glared like Death itself at the nearly comatose from happiness Okumura Rin who was kissing the ground with Tears of Joy running down his face.

_I can't believe he scored higher than me on the multiple choice!_

"Okumura-kun how the hell did you do it?"

"Hmph, even idiots get lucky sometimes."

"I'm happy for you Rin!"

"You must have studied real hard, Okumura-kun!"

"Hai, Nii-san stayed up night and day!"

"No." It came out shaky and everyone paused.

"No, I didn't." A hysterical laugh bubbled up from the wellspring of joy that was supplying the tear ducts higher up on his face and he burst out laughing manically hands to the sky, "I just put C for all the answers and got a 96! Take that bitches! GYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH~"

Suguro was going to kill him.

* * *

**19. Imply that Neuhaus uses the bodies of his vanquished enemies to make his Ghoul summons.**

* * *

"Sensei?" Shima asked hesitantly after the joke he thoughtlessly voiced.

"Detention." And Neuhaus Igor turned back to the board he was drawling a seal on.

Everyone looked at him with a mixture of pity and That's-what-you-get-for-being-an-idiot. Izumo, on the other hand, was turning a vague green color and Rin a pale white for reasons unknown.

* * *

**20. Take life advice from Mephisto.**

* * *

"So you're saying that Egyn has been pestering you to set fire to Amaimon's room." There was a delicate pause. "…Why?"

The dual light gold, and white-haired Demon King of Fire grumbled into the palm of his hand while glaring daggers at the other male in the room. "…"

A stress mark appeared on the top of the Demon King of Time (and Space's) cheek and setting down his cup of tea, he narrowed his neon green irises at the mumbling Demon. "If all you do is talk into your hand I can't help you, you know." Why had he ever agreed to this?

Looking as disgruntled as the amethyst and lavender-haired Demon he growled looking annoyed, "I said, it's because the Liquefied-prick is mad that Shrub-kun stole the Demoness he was trying to seduce into his bed. The kid just up and walked by and she dropped 'em like a hot Coal Tar." A sneer began to rise on his face, his orange eyes glinting with mirth at the memory. And then it fell apart and he snarled, claws digging into Samael's antique English-side chair that was more than a century old, "And now he wants revenge."

Samael raised an eyebrow, looking pointedly at Iblis. "Thus he turned to you? Out of all the other Demon Kings, you, who he wants to rip to shreds on a daily basis? …And why pray tell, did you come to _me?"_

The Fire King had the nerve to look sheepish, something the taller Demon had seen very rarely. And it never meant anything good. "Because…well, you see…" Hanging his head he grit out, "I…_owe_," He spat that word out like it was choking him. "Shrub-kun a-" And then looked like he was about to gag. "A _**favor."**_

Blinking, Samael's lip twitched and he smirked. "Oh-ho~ I…see." A look of interest appeared on his face twisting his lips into a sardonic sneer. "And if you don't mind my…asking, why is that?"

Looking a bit green and flushed a bright red he grumbled low in his throat as if he was trying to hack something unpleasant up, "He- Gah-!" Throwing his hands up into the air, he snarled, "Otou-san wanted me to eat his, "Lava Cake de Bleu," and I begged Shrub-kun to get rid of it while he wasn't looking…" A pained look came over his features before he looked the other Demon King in the eye and hissed, "He- _**He**_ _**ate it!**_ Like no joke! And all because I asked him to help! He could have died! And then Otou-san would have blamed me!"

Samael blinked and then turned a bit green himself, all his pomp and peppiness dissolving into a boneless goo as he slid down the back of his chair. "Oh…Oh!" A queasy smile wobbled on his features' but no matter what he tried, he couldn't quite manage his haughty sneer at that moment. "Well, um-" He coughed discreetly and took a quick sip of his tea. You didn't eat his Tou-san's cooking the same way no one ever ate his. It just wasn't _done. _Mostly because the last "taste-tester," ended up dying via the soup he had eaten dissolving his intestines.

Smiling sickly, the green-eyed Demon stood up and dipped his head in the others direction. "I suggest you don't set fire to Amaimon's room then. Good luck with- Well, all that!" And quickly "poofed" himself as far away from his office as he could to the most obscure candy store in all of Japan. He needed something sweet and edible to get his stomach off his Tou-san's cooking.

* * *

16. I needed to display Mephisto's art. With a burning.

17. Thus Flame Training comes full circle and he _must_ have tried it at least once?

18. Real Life example. No, it was not _me._

19. Hehe, Neuhaus is so angsty. I had to.

20. And finally** starbringer101** wanted it. I just supplied the...well, the refreshments? *Takes a bite out of "Lava de Bleu" and dies*

Hope you guys liked that!~ I should really do a Halloween one next...

Tarry a while. Thou art so fair. ~ Wild-Tama


End file.
